N: So, to start, Em, tell us about your career journey to date.
I've had a varied career journey, I'd say. I've worked in state and local government, private enterprise, and the not-for-profit sector. So, I've kind of ticked them all off, besides federal government. I feel like I need variety in my career and although all those jobs have been in the communications, marketing, stakeholder engagement, and events space, the people, the places and the experiences I've had within all those different jobs is what keeps it interesting for me. I've had over 20 jobs since I started my full-time working career 15-ish years ago. I look for contract work because it keeps things fresh and exciting for me.
Right now, I'm on secondment from Transport for NSW, working for the Department of Primary Industries in a community engagement role for the Varroa Mite emergency response. Varroa mites are parasitic mites which are bad news for European honeybees here in Australia. So, the Varroa Mite emergency response, which is a biosecurity emergency, is aiming to eradicate Varroa in Australia to protect the bee industry, the pollination industry, and basically our food source. I speak with effected stakeholders, beekeeping clubs and industry bodies and make sure they're all aware of where we're up to with the program and we listen to them to see what they need from us information-wise, and we organise events and create communications material. It’s a wild ride everyday with priorities always changing.
I also have my own business, Motherhood Milestones, where I create heartfelt cards for real life mums. They are magnetised and can live on the fridge, reminding everyone in the house just how important mums are. They celebrate mothers and acknowledge those often-hidden moments in motherhood. Working on my business lights me up and I’d love to combine some advocacy work in there to make real change to policies in the motherhood space.
My most favourite job was when I was with Mission Australia because I was making an impact on real people's lives, and you could see that through what you were doing everyday which really lit me up. I was doing internal comms for Mission Australia in their head office for all their employees. It was great because you got to be across what everyone was doing and were able to share real people’s stories from within the organization. I love telling stories and highlighting people and why they do what they do.
Also, in that charity space I also worked for the Department of Premier and Cabinet, and I was part of setting up the very first workplace giving program for the NSW public sector which is where public servants can give money pre-tax to charities. It’s a win for everyone because it reduces taxable income and you’re supporting a charity. We set that up for all 400,000 NSW public sector employees and I started as the digital comms person doing all the advertising and worked my way up to the Senior Project Officer implementing the actual program across all the different government agencies in NSW. So that was one of my key career achievements, because not only did the program make an awesome impact, but personally it gave me satisfaction knowing we were making a real difference to those charities.
I've been a working mum for a little over one year. I took fifteen months off for maternity leave before going back to work so I'm pretty fresh in the whole working mum side of things. I went back part-time as well, so I'm doing three days a week at the moment which has presented a whole host of other challenges I never really considered either.
N: Wow, I have a lot of questions. You've done passion projects before, as you said, Mission Australia, you were passionate about and you set up that huge charity give-back program. What made you change careers if you loved Mission Australia so much? I'm curious.
So at Mission Australia I had the best boss in the world, and she was incredible and motivating and supportive and made me do slightly scary things that were ultimately growth opportunities. She left the organization and I got swallowed up into another team that was not as motivating or uplifting, so I had a very different experience in that team. I was in Sydney at this stage, and I had built a house in Orange and my previous manager had honoured a flexible working arrangement so I could work in the Orange Office a few days a week, and then come to Sydney a couple of times a month or so and she was more than happy for that to happen. But then my new boss dishonoured that. So, then I didn't have any choice really but to quit.
N: Yeah, that's so interesting, because no matter how much you love your career, having good leadership is so impactful.
Yes, 1000%. Pretty much every time I've left a job it's probably been because of a manager.
Leadership is massive, and there are a lot of not-so-great leaders out there because, as I said, I've had like over 20 jobs and I can count on one hand how many leaders have been inspiring and thoughtful but when they are it’s an incredible working experience.
N: You mentioned you've been working mum for just over a year. Has it been eye-opening? and what significant challenges have you had to overcome? That you'd never thought of previously you would have to do before becoming a mum?
I never factored in how sick kids get from daycare. I'd never even heard people talk about it, it was a complete shock to me. So, not only, do you have a sick baby that you need to look after and all the health implications that come from that, you’re putting yourself last to look after the baby, but you as the woman or mother, is expected to take the days off to look after them and you're expected to book the doctor's appointment and buy the medicine or research what's going on to make them better. That was when the real mental load of motherhood was apparent to me. I think because it was so relentless, he would get sick, recover and then go back for a day and then get sick again and you kind of feel like you're always letting someone down. Like in the very beginning, because you're letting down work because you have to take time off and you're letting down your baby because they're sick because you put them in daycare. I mean, it's just very emotional, a mental battle in the very beginning when you start becoming a working mum. You don't know what's coming, you honestly don't. Then it hits you in the face like a truck, and there are just so many complexities to it that you have to really work on top of figuring out who you are now as a working mum.
N: So, is that where your motherhood milestones business came into it just after you became a mum or were you passionate about it prior?
Yeah, I never appreciated mums like I did before becoming one. I read this book called Mama Rising by Amy Taylor-Kabazz about matrescence and the journey of becoming a mother or the transformation of becoming a mother. I never knew what that was and as soon as I found that term out, I was like what? Why don’t we know this? And realising how undervalued motherhood was, or is in today's society, and how much it impacts us, but it's not given the time or respect it deserves to be fully understood just floored me. You don't even get the chance to explore yourself as a mother because you're like, oh, got to go back to work, got to pay those bills, got to be who I was without having time to understand who I am now. Motherhood is a massive identity shift and everyone knows it’s a wild ride but feeling first hand how undervalued it is prompted me to start my business.
If you've got a healthy mother, you've got a healthy baby. So, if we focus more on her motherhood experience, then everyone's going to benefit. The family's going to benefit, her career is going to benefit, her boss, the team, and everyone around her is going to benefit because she's going to know who she is and what she's here for, and she's going to be clearer on everything.
N: You've got a card design that says it's your birthday too, mum. I love that one. I love it because I kind of give myself an internal celebration when it's my children's birthday and ohh I remember back on this day.
Yeah, 100%, and for that whole year that mum has been looking after and raising and developing that child, and that is just not at all thought of. It's like you have some cake and presents for this kid who's done nothing but be born, and the mum actually is the one that's done all the hard yards and grown and learn and overcome all these challenges and yeah, it just goes unnoticed, and I think that's a shame. But now there’s a card to shift that conversation and remind her just how valuable and worthy of celebration she is too.
N: And that, I guess leads into my next question. What's some of the things that got you through those challenging times. Do you think you know that learning about that term really helped you as well and how I guess has it helped you in your career?
Well, I think, learning about matrescence puts things into perspective. I think time has also done its thing as well. I've had a year now and Lincs had a year now, and we've both adjusted to what this new normal looks like. I think talking to other women about their experiences and trying to get the authentic story out of them helps, not what people put on social media or those surface level conversations but really asking like how the F did you do this? How did you manage work, and raising a child, and then being sick, and those daycare drop offs where they're crying and hysterically screaming for you and then you go to the car and you burst out crying all before 8 in the morning and then you have to go do a full day of work. Like, what!?
N: Yeah, I get to work and I'm so dishevelled and they just know!
Literally. You live this whole other day before you even start work. When you look at it, motherhood is an impossible task until you shift your expectations and be ok with doing your best, even if that doesn’t translate to greatness which is hard. I think getting ideas from other mums is helpful and having that community around you to know you're not alone because everyone's experiencing the same thing, because you're like, OK, I'm feeling crazy right now, but so is everyone else and that's kind of what's normal at the moment, so I’ll just go with it.
N: And finding those people that are real and authentic and trying to block out the noise of those that aren't.
And just focusing on what I could control and what made me happy and just doing more of that. It’s the small things that help. I don't think I've overcome those challenges yet to be honest though.
N: Absolutely. And what sort of things leading into that, do you consider the things that make you happy and what is your self-care and what does that look like for you? In this season of motherhood.
I think it's actions and thoughts that remind me that I'm as important and worthy as the love and care that I freely, and without thought, give to others. So, it's just really treating myself the way I would treat the people I love. Right now, as I said, I feel like what's self-care to me is getting that community of women around me and knowing that this is the motherhood experience everyone experiences, and it's not just me being like, Oh my God, why is this so insane?
So I go to women's circles once a month where we all get together and there's journal prompts that we write about, and then we go around the circle and talk about it and while it's beneficial for me to share my point of view, the most benefit I get is from hearing other people share their thoughts because sometimes I get a fresh perspective and most of the time I just get that feeling like yeah, thank God we're just all in this together.
N: They look so relaxing and in a calm environment, they look amazing.
Yes, yes, exactly. We sometimes do meditation and there's snacks, and there's the social aspect of it as well. So, it ticks all the boxes for me from a self-care perspective and it's the thing I look forward to each month to give myself some me time with like-minded women.
N: And just a couple more questions. Do you have a favorite quote or a book you mentioned before you learn about Matrescence but would that be your favorite book? or do you have a favourite quote that you go to? That really helps you get through.
Like honestly right now my favourite book is “Sort Your Career Out”. Every word I read on every page, well mainly when Shelly was in the driver's seat, mostly everything she said I was like, yes, yes, yes, folding down the pages, highlighting and making notes. It was all relevant for me right now. But I did really like Atomic Habits as well, just for getting those little ideas where you think something might be unattainable, but really it just takes a few small shifts in what you do and when you do them and that had a big impact to me as well, because it kind of gave me that anything is possible mindset.
And then from a career point of view, I don't know if it's a quote, but I say it pretty much every day and it had to have come from somewhere, "teamwork makes the dreamwork". And I love that because I'm just such a big believer in collaboration and getting people's ideas to make a richer product or have a better experience. So, I always really value different outlooks and opinions on things. I think working together is the best way to get a better outcome for everyone because you can use everyone's strengths.
N: And it's interesting you say that about the book, right? Sort your career out came at a really good time for you, and that's the whole point of personal development books and Non-fiction books, you'll read something, and you think, oh, you know, that doesn't really apply to me, and you put it away and then something else might happen in your life or your career, and you'll pull it back out. And think, holy crap. Why did I not see this before? So yeah, it's the time in your life when certain books make sense and really have an impact.
That's exactly right, I feel like that as well. I started reading the Ambitious Like A Mother, and I was like, you know what, I don't think I loved everything she said, I agreed with it, but I was like, this is probably not for me at this point in time. Because I'm quite happy doing three days a week and focusing on my business and looking for advocacy work and spending days with Linc and I still don’t really know what I’ll do when I grow up.
Like you said, you put it away and then bring it back out, when it will speak to you in a different way.
N: And they're both such different books like Ambitious Like A Mother wasn't a workbook and something you could answer questions. Whereas the other one was a lot more reflective. So, I think as a person you enjoy that reflective side of things and knowing your values and strengths and really getting it all down on paper.
N: You've been a member from the very beginning, and I so appreciate your support and your engagement. It's so nice to see every month. So I appreciate you, and I just want to know what's your favorite thing about Career Mum Collective?
Well, I love all of it, but to be specific, I really like the exposure to different books or ideas and content that I wouldn't have chosen for myself. But the fact that it's come to me in a delivery and I'm relating to the content I'm like yes, this is something I need to read. So, I really like that because it's not up to me to go and find it off the shelf and figure out which book to read. It’s easy and relevant and helpful!
Then the masterclasses! When do you have the opportunity to speak to the author of the book? Never! I find that valuable and I’m grateful that you organise those.
The online community as well, just knowing that you're in a group of like-minded women in this stage of their life, and just being able to go to the Facebook group and ask, ‘what's going on with me?’ Like, does anyone have any ideas because they would have a wealth of information from their own experiences and opinions, and I find those three things I really love about the Career Mum Collective, but basically all of it.
N: Oh thank you. Is there anything you want to add, anything you want to leave us with?
I feel like becoming a mum, and becoming a working mum has made me good at setting boundaries and focusing on what's important. I feel like my career has benefited from that as well because I can be more focused on a task. My tolerance for office politics is so low now, I just don't even enter into it anymore because I don't have the time or energy, but my need for satisfaction at the end of the day and adding value outside of motherhood is so much higher. So, I want to do a really good job and get stuck in and create something of value and substance, because then I feel satisfied at the end of the day because motherhood is that relentless ride that doesn't always give you the satisfaction that you need.
And all the work we've got to do on our values through the different Career Mum Collective masterclasses and books has been invaluable for me because I feel like before I was just living life ad-hoc and now I really have a system in place where I can ask does this align to my values? Does this work with my strengths? And I can make decisions from that standpoint which is just so much more empowering.
N: Thank you so much for your time today Emily, it was so great to hear your career journey to date and what you love about Career Mum Collective.
Thank you!
You can follow Emily over on Instagram and you can purchase her cards at www.motherhoodmilestones.com